Stuck in traffic?

First of all, welcome to my new blog. I have started this because I have a lot of pet peeves. I hope I can use this as a means of educating those people who have not yet fully understood how to live in society. Frankly, most of them should be grateful that whole "survival of the fittest" thing isn't being applied today. With any luck, I'll add a pinch of humor so the rest of us can enjoy the blog.

Today I got stuck in traffic. For everybody who commutes to work, this same event happens twice a day, five days a week. That's almost as many times as you eat meals on those days. Depending on how quickly you eat, on any day when you're stuck in traffic, you spend more time wedged between cars than you do eating.

My concern here is not with traffic in general. It's a fact of life. My concern is with the people that cause more traffic. They are essentially saying, "I don't care where you want to go or how soon you want to get there. Your destination arrival time does not solely depend on how early you leave - it also depends on ME."

There are a lot of ways people cause traffic to be worse and even more heinous than it already is. I'm only going to focus on one today:
LEAVING A TON OF SPACE BETWEEN YOUR CAR AND THE ONE IN FRONT OF YOU.

I know, satellites have been dropping out of the sky lately, but even if one plummeted down to earth, intent on hitting your rear bumper and slamming you into the car in front of you, chances are you wouldn't be held accountable for not leaving enough room between the two cars. Besides, if Hollywood has taught us anything, it's that most satellites are the harbingers of superhuman powers. So you'll soon be able to fly, shoot lasers from your fingertips, and/or eat Eggos so fast your hand becomes a blur. With those powers, you can afford a little fender-bender.

The problem is you're not thinking about the people behind you. And not just the car you can see in your rear-view mirror - what about the guy three cars back who can't make it through the stoplight because you're taking up seventeen Hummers worth of space in your lane? How about the guy behind him, who just wants to turn right at the light, but is stuck because of your inability to think of anything or anyone that is not within a 6-inch radius of you?

Are you sending a text to a friend? Plugging in your GPS because you forgot how to get home even though you've driven this same route of traffic every weekday for three years straight? Just plain distracted by thoughts of how in the world the Joker got away from Batman in The Dark Knight when Batman jumped out the window to save Rachel at the party and ended up at the front door of the same building? (Holy revolving doors, Batman! That Joker's a sly one.)

Whatever the reason, pull forward! I'm not asking for you to kiss bumpers. Move forward as far as you're comfortable. But if there's more than three feet between vehicles, I'm going to walk up with measuring tape, show you the ridiculous amount of space you're wasting, and kick your hubcap.